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ARE YOU BABY WISE?

Two little lines with a whole lot of meaning

 Finding out I was pregnant was one of the best days of my life! I couldn't wait for my husband and I to grow our family and welcome a much anticipated baby into our world.  However like most first time moms I found my self questioning everything baby!!!  One question I was really curious about is when do I feed baby, when do they sleep and how the heck do I find structure in what seemed to me was going to be a baby dominated life. 

  It was at my baby shower with all my closest friends that a few mommy's told me I had to get this book called Baby wise.  "It would change my life" so they said.  Of course I had to find out what all the hype was about, so a week later I had it in my hand, ready to learn how I could become "Baby wise."



  This book was simple and easy to read. It had very good logic behind it's purpose and offered a simple step by step on how to get your baby to sleep thru the night, give structure and routine.  In a nutshell the book is about putting your baby on a 2 1/2-3 hour routine in the beginning, PDF (Parent directed feeding) and giving your child the gift of sleep. 

A typical schedule could look as follows:

7 am- First feeding of morning, followed by playtime/wake time then put down to nap
10 am- next feeding, playtime/wake time, nap
1 pm- feeding, playtime/wake time, nap
4pm- feeding, playtime/wake time, nap
7pm- feeding, possible playtime, lay down to sleep
10 pm- final feeding of the day, put directly back down to sleep

(For the first 8 weeks your baby will need to eat no longer than 4 hours after the 10pm feeding. Although most newborns will let you know when they are hungry, if you happen to have a sleepy little one make sure they don't go past this 4 hour mark.)

You basically continue this routine which will ultimately help establish the following;

• Stabilizes your milk production for breast feeding
• Gives mom and baby a routine in their day, allowing for necessary planning when outings or errands are to occur
• provides a sense of stability to your baby. You no longer have to wonder "what does my baby need" "why are they crying"  If you have fed them, changed them, and are now laying them down, their crys are simply their way of learning how to self soothe.
• By allowing them to not learn to associate feeding with sleeping, you're giving them the gift of becoming an independent sleeper. 
• While feeding they are getting a good quality feeding rather than cluster feeding and snacking

  The emphasis of all of this is getting your baby into a routine of a nice long nights sleep.  The one thing the book makes valid points on is it's not just healthy for mom and dad to get back some much needed rest, but as well as the baby.  They are human just as we are and just because they are still young, they need sleep just as much as adults.  There doing a lot of developing and learning when their awake, which also means their little minds need time to recoup and rest.  Teaching your baby how to sleep thru the night allows them to find structure at an early age. 

  I now have a 3 month old beautiful baby girl. I've come a long way from her first day home and now. The one thing I have found is there is a difference in a text book baby and reality. My daughter didn't come out with all the guidelines the book said were going to make it so much easier. She did however have a mom who was informed and ready to face some sleepless nights, some really tough feedings and some resistance from those around her because she knew what would become best for her child.  I had my own husband talking me out of doing the steps the book provides.  He liked to call it my "bible," lol but I knew what I was doing,and all the while I kept my mommy instinct in high regards. 

  The toughest part of following this book is helping the baby start this routine. Newborns just want to sleep!!! Can you blame them? They've been thru a lot, and to be honest, I was right there with her! So when I had to wake her cause 3 hours had passed I found I had to be pretty creative in ways to keep her awake during her feeding. My husband would help and flap her little arms like a chicken (gave both of us a good laugh being sleep deprived) I would grab a bag of frozen veggies and put them on her legs or back just to get her to wake up. I would undress her before I began and talk to her to keep her on high alert with the noise.  All of these were YES, EXHAUSTING, but I knew would pay off! There were days when we would fall of track a bit in the times, but adjusted just fine to the next one. She sometimes just wasn't that hungry, so in contradiction a bit to the book we would let her sleep a little longer than 3 hours, and wake her at about the 4 hour mark. 

  At about 6 weeks I noticed she was starting to only wake at 2am for a feeding and then we would put her directly to sleep again, and because she had started to become such a great independent sleeper, she would do so with little to no fuss at all.  Due to starting her 7 am feeding everyday since she was a week old she actually started to be hungry on her own at that time, and so would start the first of our days feedings no matter if she just ate at 4:30am or 5.  When 8 weeks came around she was sleeping from 10 pm to 2 am, getting a feeding and then sleeping until about 6:30.  That's when we started breaking her of that 2am feeding. Instead of offering her the bottle right away we offered her the pacifier and a little rocking in mom or dads arms.  We did this for a week straight and it was NOT easy let me tell you, since you would have to repeat every 15 minutes or so until she fell back asleep. Nonetheless by week 9 I had a baby that would lay down for bed at 10pm and wake up a little later each night on her own, from 2 am to 4am to 5:30 until one day her dad and I both woke up at 7am and realized (dun, dun, dun..) SHE HAD SLEPT THRU THE NIGHT!! Woo Hoo! Not only that but she also started during the day getting hungry on her own around the 3 1/2-3 hour mark! 

  She is now 14 weeks and has her last feeding at about 8:45-9:00pm. She wakes up between 7:30-8:30 happy and smiling from a solid nights sleep.  I never let her go more than 12 hours due to her being a breastfed baby, but the book does say if your baby is formula fed they can go 13 hours. 

  Let me tell you, in my experience this book was such a great foundation for me and baby! Our update at 14 weeks is this; I have a very happy, content, well rested and routine baby.  I can almost always predict why she is fussy or what she needs. My milk production is amazing!! I have a very established milk supply and I am very confident I can provide my baby with breast milk all the way up to a year, which for me was of utmost importance.  I have less worry when planning events since I can plan around the times I know she will be hungry and ready for her feeding.  Being she left the hospital losing more than 10% of her body weight, the doctors were concerned of her eating enough, and gaining weight. I can proudly say she never lost more weight, and is now in the 55th percentile for her age group in both weight and height requirements, all of which I attribute to her solid feeding routine. 

  To sum up my experience with Baby Wise I would HIGHLY recommend it to moms, and even am following up on the books that they wrote to take you through their toddler stages.  I already tell my friends all about it, and some have applied to their own babies. I am so thankful to my friends who told me about it at my baby shower, and my husband who once mocked me calling it my "bible" even admits, I was right and he is really impressed with my dedication to it. Which leads me into my final statement.. Stay dedicated, informed and always intuitive when it comes to following this book. You will most definitely be challenged, and question if it's right for your baby, and all I can say is put your instincts and baby first of course, but don't give up.  In the end, and just a few short weeks you will have such a well established sleep for both you and baby you will be glad you followed it, and crowned the tile of being, BABY WISE :) 

  Good Luck and Congratulations on your newest addition to the family!

BREASTFEEDING BASICS, WHERE DO I EVEN START?

I'm sure most new mothers can agree that no matter how many books you read, doctors you see or classes you take there is still always something that happens as a new parent that you question.. what do I do??  The one topic I found to be the most confusing was breastfeeding. There was so much to learn and it all started the second I heard my baby girl cry for the first time. I realized I was her meal ticket to good health, steady growth and breakfast, lunch, dinner, snack, midnight snack, 2 am snack.. well, you get the point. 

So as a new mom I thought I would give the best advice I had to moms who are interested in breastfeeding, are breastfeeding or are just curious as to what this whole thing is about, because let me tell you, it will be a constant job on your part, but it also is the biggest feeling of accomplishment when you are able to successfully do it month after month. 

First off, I want to make sure I make myself clear, I am not a licensed professional, I am simply a first time mom with experience that is still fresh in my mind. If you have any medical questions please make sure to ask your pediatrician or lactation specialist. 

To get you started here are the basics of MUST haves to get you started:

1) Breast pump
A piece of advice, ask your doctor to write you a prescription for this ahead of time, you will be surprised based on your insurance how many will cover it, if not 100% then some part. A really good one can cost you in the amounts of $300. I had mine billed thru insurance at the hospital, and my insurance paid for 80% of it and even had it delivered to my hospital room before I left. Talk about saving money and time!  I have the Medela Pump In Style Advanced. It has been great so far and works amazing on road trips due to its battery option.  

2) Milk Storage bags
If you are interested in buying in bulk, a great website for new moms is amazonmom.com You can join a subscription and find things at a much cheaper rate,everything from breast milk bags to diapers to wipes. Truly a money saver!

3) Hands free bra
You will find there are not enough hands to do everything, and the last thing you want is to be holding these lovely funnels up to your nipples for 20 min while a baby is crying or needing something.  The hands free Easy Expressions was one of my best investments!  

Now that you have your basics and your bundle of joy is finally here, it's time to pump, pump, pump it up!

Some tricks to getting and keeping a great supply:

1) The one thing I found super important right away is finding a routine. It will not only help your baby establish a sense of stability, but as well will help your body build up milk supply and be available for baby when needed.  I chose the method of PDF (parent directed feeding). This allowed me to every 2 1/2-3 hours feed my baby, and then pump following her feeding.  Within a week I had a great milk supply that came in, and was able to begin my back stock of milk. 
Every woman is different, some women like to nurse and only pump a few times a day, others like to pump and then give baby the bottle, whatever your method that's fine as long as you try to keep on top of every 2 1/2-3 hours.  It's also very important to make sure you clear out your milk ducts after breastfeeding to keep from getting Mastitis. 

2) Make sure you drink plenty of fluids. I found it tough some days and love to add some crystal light to my water to make it taste more enjoyable.  Gatorade is also known to help boost supply as well as orange juice.  Plus doesn't hurt getting extra vitamin c in there!

3) Healthy variety of good fats, proteins, fruits and veggies are key to both baby and mommy! Your body is working hard burning 500 calories a day, try to refuel it with healthy calories.

4) Be conscious of your milk and times as much as possible. I felt like the first few weeks my life was controlled by baby eating, pumping, diaper changing, quick nap and then do all over again, which was true, However staying aware of time was my foundation for obtaining a good milk supply. 

5) The one question that probably crosses every new moms mind is "Am I producing enough? Is my baby getting enough to eat?"  Your baby will eat till he or she is full, and pumping after helps to clear out the rest of the milk, however it also sends a signal to your body to make more, seeing as it thinks that's how much your baby needs for next time. This is how I was able to build up my supply before returning to work.  When you get comfortable with what back up supply you have you can start backing off the constant pumping. I now only do 3-4 times a day, where as when she was born I would pump sometimes up to 8 times a day. Not every woman has time for that, so do as your schedule allows. You will know your baby is getting enough to eat by monitoring their diapers. If they have at least 8-10 wet diapers in a day, and 2-3 stool's a day, you have a healthy growing newborn. They may have times they go thru a growth spurt and you need to feed before the 2 1/2 hours and that's ok. One trick I found was I would give my baby a bottle of my breast milk at these times to fill her up, so I could see that she was eating a nice full meal. 

Lastly be patient and kind to yourself.  You're a new mom, you and your baby are figuring this all out, and I promise you will look back week by week and realize, this was easy, and totally worth it.  :)

THIS LETTER TO ME

Poetry has been one of those things I've always used to clear my head, and get my feelings out on paper. I have a passion for poetry, and find that i'm able to express myself well when it comes to this type of creative writing.  The following poem I wrote when I had just endured a really hard breakup. I was engaged to this man, and while he was deployed he decided to join an online dating website, met a girl and came home to marry her a day after meeting her in person.  All the while I was still wearing my ring..  thank goodness for pawn shops right?  This poem was my therapy. I wrote down every good trait I could about myself from myself and read it daily to build my confidence back up, my moral as well as my inner strength.  It was my words of affirmation that I was good enough.  Hope you enjoy! 

THIS LETTER TO ME


Your smart, your funny,
Your beautiful inside and out,
You believe in people,
and love them without a doubt,

Your smile is infectious,
Your heart pure and real,
Everyone can see it,
just by how you make them feel,

Your soft brown eyes
are genuine and sincere,
You have a way of comforting
anyone you are near,

Your heart is as big
as all the water on earth,
You believe in people
and let them see their true worth,

You have unselfish motives,
Put everyone before yourself,
You believe in emotions over beauty,
and love over wealth,

Strength is something you posses
from your skin down to your bone,
You have faith in god above,
and know that your never alone,

Life has thrown its troubles
as hard as it could throw,
But never have you backed down,
each trial has helped you grow,

Right now it feels impossible
but I promise the pain will subside,
Just remember all of who you are,
and the qualities you hold inside,

The light will shine for you shortly,
and happiness soon you will see,
and whenever you get discouraged,
Just pick up and read This Letter to Me....

Welcome to my world..

Hi!
Welcome to this little page I like to call my Therapy. I am a 29 year old newlywed (hitting the two year mark and counting) a new mommy to a beautiful baby girl, and pretty much the luckiest woman in the world.  I love embracing this new mom thing in all it's glory, throw up and all.  My husband balances me out pretty well in that I don't like to cook, luckily he does, and he doesn't like to clean, luckily I do. We're a match made in heaven.  I feel like there is so much to talk about these days a blog seems to be the next reasonable thing to do, right?   Here are a few pictures of my life, and a quick way to get to know me :)

AN ANGEL GETS HIS WINGS

Landon's box made by the nurses at the
hospital. Has picures, his clothes, footprints and
birth information all inside.

August 11, 2011 was one of the most life changing day's I have ever experienced.  There I was sitting on the edge of my husbands bed looking at a stick with two pink lines... Pregnant.  I had been told by doctors that due to my Type 1 diabetes I would not be able to successfuly have babies, it would be risky, tough and I would need a lot of changes to my health before that was even atainable.  Here I was, unprepared, and to be honest scared. I wasn't scared of having a baby, that was something I had always dreamed of, I was scared at the timing, the lack of tight control I was supposed to have on my body in order to get pregnant.  It was in that moment I knew I had to stop working two jobs, sometimes +80 hours a week and start focusing on my diabetes, and this unborn child.  I did just that, and within three months had my A1c down from an 11.2 (yes, for those who know these numbers all too well, this was HORRIBLE) to a 6.2!  I was put on an insulin pump and started this somewhat foreign new life of controlled health and less hours at work.  My husband encouraged me and supported every decision.. we were going to be parents and we couldn't be more excited.

The months to follow were very intense. There were doctors appointments after appointments with the high risk ward.  We got to hear our baby's heartbeat, see him on the screen, yes HIM :) We were having a little boy.  Though all of this should have been the best moments and memories of our life, they were quit opposite.  We had been told there was a problem near the skull. The doctor said it looked like Cystic Hygroma.  The following appointments were what most new parents dread, bad news after bad news. Until one day, after a series of tests we came in to get results, and instead were handed sadness.  Our babies heartbeat was gone, after 5 long months, he was now an angel above. 

I know many woman experience miscarriage, and it's not always talked about, but for me I think it's therapeutic talking about it. I hope that it helps someone else know that it's NOT YOUR FAULT. You are not alone and you as a woman can only control so much.   After 27 long hours of labor, I delivered myy little boy Landon Thomas Chesley. The same day we met him we let him go. He was our angel in diguise in so many ways because he was what allowed me to see how much more control I needed to gain on my own health, not only for myself or my husband, but now for the realization that I could have children. 



Landon's actual footprints from the hospital after I delivered him.
I had them tattoed on the last remaining spot on my sleeve, right
under my arm, closest to my heart.  His birthday is in the arches above
the halo.

November 1, 2011 was a very unique day for me. Not only in numbers was it 11-1-11, but it was signifigant to me that my number one would always be with me. He was now my number one guardian angel. 

It was determined later thru his autopsy report that he never developed kidneys. That happens in 1 in 500,000 woman, and they could not soley define his cause of death due to poor control of diabetes. However I never let that lesson learned slip thru my fingertips.  I took control and remain in great control to this day. 

The following poem I wrote for Landon shortly after I got home and reality set in.  I missed him, I missed the opportunity of holding his hand, touching his cheek and showing him how much I loved him.  I know he isn't on this earth with us, but he is most definetly watching over us.  A year and a half later I delivered a beautiful, healthy baby girl.  I know Landon watches over his sister and will forever continue to do so.  


SWEET DREAMS LITTLE MAN; SLEEP TIGHT


Good evening my angel
How are you tonight?
It’s a beautiful evening,
Not a cloud in sight.

I was just thinking of you
And missing you so much,
Wish you were in my arms
Feeling your mommy’s touch,

I know you are playing with Jesus
And probably even grandpa too,
He is quite a silly old man
I’m sure he already adores you ,

Mommy and Daddy are doing good,
Making the best of every day,
Learning how to move on now
Carrying you with us in our own way

You changed my life you know,
My angel in disguise
What a powerful force you were
For such an itty bitty size

You know your mommy and daddy
We became as close as could be
We opened a new chapter in life
And changes we were about to see

I learned to slow down for once
And gained a new perspective on myself
For once my eyes were open
To the importance of my health

I hope you know how much I tried
Mommy’s body wasn’t very strong,
I hadn’t been prepared for you
And the damage would show before long

I’ll never forget that heartbeat of yours,
So strong and so very steady
I couldn’t wait to see you baby
Be your mom, for that I was ready

But god had other plans it seems
For you were his angel to take
Given to us on borrowed time
It was in his arms you would awake

He gave you to us for so many reasons
I wish I could understand,
Why I’ll never get to kiss your cheek
Or take hold of your little hand

But know there is a place
You will forever be,
Somewhere we can meet often
Just you and me

That’s up in the stars, and past the clouds
Alongside those whose past away,
You keep my spot warm up there sweet one
Until we reunite again one day

It is time to go to sleep now Landon,
I just wanted to say goodnight,
Tell you I love and miss you so much
Sweet dreams little man; sleep tight.